- Thu Jan 18, 2007 7:25 am
#29508
Hello, let me tell you about my conversion. It took years to happen actually. I was born into a Catholic family. My family was devout and we went to Mass every Sunday. When I was a small child my family used to kneel down and pray together, but that stopped after I turned about 7. I think my family would go back and change that if they could as now they all say the rosary together as a family. (I come from Australia but married an American and have lived in the U.S for the past 27 years.) Anyway.. when I turned 18 I met a non-denominational missionary who was full of fire and zeal. He was very spiritual and had mystical experiences. I was very impressionable at the time and I was searching for a deeper relationship with God. My Catholic faith seemed dry (God forgive me) and lifeless at the time. How wrong I was! So I became a "born again Christian," and it liturally changed my life! I was on fire for God and witnessing to everyone I could. My father was not very happy about it and at the time I thought it was terrible that he wasn't happy for me. My mother was happy that I had found God and saw that it was changing me for the better. I met and married a man from America who I thought shared my faith and zeal. It turned out that he was a very weak Christian and we didn't really have much in common at all. It was the beginning of many years of suffering. My husband would be on and off again, when it came to spiritual things. I tried to be the good Christian wife and because I didn't believe in divorce, just decided that I had made my bed and must now lie on it. We had three children and I tried to bring them to Jesus. It was hard when their Dad wouldn't come to church with us. One year, about 1989, I made a trip to Australia to visit my family. They were all talking about the events in Medjugorje. My brother, (who is now a priest) gave me a pamplet to read that had Our Lady's messages. I read them and I couldn't find anything wrong with them. The years in the non-Catholic evangelical movement had convinced me that devotions to Mary was wrong. I had a very hard time with talking with my family about apparitions. It just went against my beliefs. I just didn't know what to do about them.
Years went by and I went back to Australia. I think it was 1993. My family was on fire about Medjugorje as they had been there this time. They just couldn't contain their excitement and I found myself being subjected to all the stories, tapes and videos. At one point while we were discussing this, I was about to tell them that this could be a demon.. but I couldn't get the word out of my mouth. I felt, at the time I thought it was God speaking to me, but now, I am not sure what it was, I just felt that I was being told that this was of God!!! My family was getting ready for me to say the word that they knew I was going to say and then they were surprised when I stopped and said, I feel like God is telling me this is of Him. I believe it! Now please let me have some time to chew on this because this is going to be hard for me because if this is truly of God, then my Catholic faith that I abandoned is afterall the true faith! My family was gobsmacked! Anyway.. after that I devoured everything I could about Medjugorje and told my family that I didn't know what to do about it when I got to America. When I got back I tried to find a Catholic church to secretly attend. I didn't want to cause a big disruption in my family. I got caught and it all came out. My husband was very upset and told me that I couldn't talk to the children about Catholic teachings. I did, though, and I think I was wrong to, but I wanted them to know the truth so at the time I thought it was the right thing. I think it confused them. My marriaged suffered terribly. My husband argued with me all the time about the Catholic Church's teachings on Mary, Saints, the pope... oh everything that protestants complain about all the time. It was a hard time, but a blessed time. I started attending Mass on my own. I told my husband I would go to his church too.. he was attending church again at this time. I did for a while but he really got discouraged with my being Catholic that he stopped going to church. I felt bad about that. I desired Eucharist so much but I couldn't recieve because I wasn't married in the church. My husband said there was no way he was going to get the church's blessing, so for a long time I suffered because I couldn't recieve. One day I told my husband that if he loved me he would do this for me as it was so important to me. Well.. he gave in and we had our marriage convalidated. I was able to recieve again. What a joy. My children became Catholics later, but my husband was very angry with me about that because he felt I had gone against him. I had... and I am not sure that I did the right thing as I said. I think back now, and perhaps if I had trusted God, maybe things would have turned out better. Instead I kept trying to take matters into my own hands, I think. Anyway... thank God for his patience and mercy and he must have had to use it all on me during those years. I am trying hard to learn from all my mistakes and listening and learning more. My husband has mellowed over the years. He has stopped bashing the church and even goes to Mass with me when he can. He is very proud of my brother, the priest and he believes, through some personal study, that the Eucharist is the true Body and Blood of Christ. He doesn't desire it enough to become Catholic as he still has some problems with the Church. My children have stopped practicing their faith which is a wound in my heart. I pray everyday for their conversion and that our whole family will someday soon be united and converted and filled with love, faith and devotion. My conversion story is a mixed bag really. I so love my Catholic faith. It is a treasure upon treasure and I have discovered that is is so alive and forever fresh. It is as glorious and wonderful! It was never the church that was dry and lifeless.. Why didn't I see that then. I was searching in the wrong places when I had everything I needed right under my nose. Someday I will understand why I had to take that journey. I got to go to Medjugorje a few years ago. That is another story. Quite the adventure actually. Please excuse the messy way I told this conversion story.
God bless you all.. Diane
Years went by and I went back to Australia. I think it was 1993. My family was on fire about Medjugorje as they had been there this time. They just couldn't contain their excitement and I found myself being subjected to all the stories, tapes and videos. At one point while we were discussing this, I was about to tell them that this could be a demon.. but I couldn't get the word out of my mouth. I felt, at the time I thought it was God speaking to me, but now, I am not sure what it was, I just felt that I was being told that this was of God!!! My family was getting ready for me to say the word that they knew I was going to say and then they were surprised when I stopped and said, I feel like God is telling me this is of Him. I believe it! Now please let me have some time to chew on this because this is going to be hard for me because if this is truly of God, then my Catholic faith that I abandoned is afterall the true faith! My family was gobsmacked! Anyway.. after that I devoured everything I could about Medjugorje and told my family that I didn't know what to do about it when I got to America. When I got back I tried to find a Catholic church to secretly attend. I didn't want to cause a big disruption in my family. I got caught and it all came out. My husband was very upset and told me that I couldn't talk to the children about Catholic teachings. I did, though, and I think I was wrong to, but I wanted them to know the truth so at the time I thought it was the right thing. I think it confused them. My marriaged suffered terribly. My husband argued with me all the time about the Catholic Church's teachings on Mary, Saints, the pope... oh everything that protestants complain about all the time. It was a hard time, but a blessed time. I started attending Mass on my own. I told my husband I would go to his church too.. he was attending church again at this time. I did for a while but he really got discouraged with my being Catholic that he stopped going to church. I felt bad about that. I desired Eucharist so much but I couldn't recieve because I wasn't married in the church. My husband said there was no way he was going to get the church's blessing, so for a long time I suffered because I couldn't recieve. One day I told my husband that if he loved me he would do this for me as it was so important to me. Well.. he gave in and we had our marriage convalidated. I was able to recieve again. What a joy. My children became Catholics later, but my husband was very angry with me about that because he felt I had gone against him. I had... and I am not sure that I did the right thing as I said. I think back now, and perhaps if I had trusted God, maybe things would have turned out better. Instead I kept trying to take matters into my own hands, I think. Anyway... thank God for his patience and mercy and he must have had to use it all on me during those years. I am trying hard to learn from all my mistakes and listening and learning more. My husband has mellowed over the years. He has stopped bashing the church and even goes to Mass with me when he can. He is very proud of my brother, the priest and he believes, through some personal study, that the Eucharist is the true Body and Blood of Christ. He doesn't desire it enough to become Catholic as he still has some problems with the Church. My children have stopped practicing their faith which is a wound in my heart. I pray everyday for their conversion and that our whole family will someday soon be united and converted and filled with love, faith and devotion. My conversion story is a mixed bag really. I so love my Catholic faith. It is a treasure upon treasure and I have discovered that is is so alive and forever fresh. It is as glorious and wonderful! It was never the church that was dry and lifeless.. Why didn't I see that then. I was searching in the wrong places when I had everything I needed right under my nose. Someday I will understand why I had to take that journey. I got to go to Medjugorje a few years ago. That is another story. Quite the adventure actually. Please excuse the messy way I told this conversion story.
God bless you all.. Diane
Jesus and Mary, we love you, Save souls.
...
.....But he is not into Medjugorje which is his choice...It does not bother him at all that I am a believer of Medjugorje....
I went back up to look at Starbright's post and I guess I read it wrong and thought the husband question was for me. Oh well... you got an earful didn't you.. 
